Deepak Mishra

A preacher, who shall we say was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help encourage and better equip pastors for their ministry. Among the speakers were many well known and dynamic speakers. One such boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire crowd's attention, said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that wasn't my wife!" The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, "And that woman was my mother!" - The crowd burst into laughter and delivered the rest of his talk, which went over quite well. The next week, the pastor decided he'd give this humor thing a try, and use that joke in his sermon. As he surely approached the pulpit that sunny Sunday, he tried to rehearse the joke in his head. It suddenly seemed a bit foggy to him. Getting to the microphone he said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of another woman that was not my wife!" The congregation inhaled hal...

A distrait dogmatic virulent vitriolic vociferous whimsical farcical boorish cacopygian bitch These are still not enough to vituperate any girl. After all, they are species with brain having a paired ganglia in the head end and consisting of about 250,000 brain cells. And if these lines are not understood by girls, my point is proved.

FUCK a girl just once and she will happily LOVE you for the rest of your life and LOVE a girl just once and she will FUCK your life forever

My dear friend CP is honored with the most talented speaker in the whole world, and that too in the form of his dearest GF, a GF who speaks faster than AC frequency. The poor little boy used to come home and fall flat on the bed ( with his shoes on ) and seemed as if he had come after battling 3rd world war.

I was fine before you walked into my world I met you and my life became so curled twisted and whirled I loved you so much believing you as my fate I realize it now that it was the hell's gate I don't know loving you what have I got I just know right now I hate you a lot I hate your hair, your clothes, I hate your style I hate your humor, your voice, I hate your smile I hate to see you because the more I see you, the more I think of you I hate to see everything that belongs to you because they just remind me of you I hate you when you don’t even care to talk at me I hate you when you ignore the stupid me I hate you when I wake up in the morning because you are the first thing on my mind I hate you when I go to bed at night because you are in my dreams every time I hate you when I’m feeling lonely and you not there I hate you when you’re sad and don't share I hate you because you don’t know how much I love you I hate you because the truth is that I can’t ha...

Don't worry won't mind you. Just wanna remind you. There is a person in this part of town who sometimes feel lonely. His heart beats and mind wonders for one damsel only.

I'm sorry - I was wrong Too often we don't realize What we have until it is gone Too often we wait too late to say "I'm sorry - I was wrong." Sometimes it seems we hurt the ones We hold dearest to our hearts And we allow foolish things To tear our lives apart. Far too many times we let Unimportant things into our mind And then it's usually too late To see what made us blind. So be sure that you let people know How much they mean to you Take that time to say the words Before your time is through. Be sure that you appreciate Everything you've got And be thankful for the little things in life that mean a lot.

ONLY 3 things I want to tell you 1. You very well know how much I am hurt When you don’t talk to me, I am hurt When you don’t reply my SMS, I am hurt When you don’t pick my calls, I am hurt When you don’t call back after missed calls, I am hurt When I had to think to call you, I am hurt When you are online and don’t ping me, I am hurt When your phone is busy, I am hurt When I see you sad on phone, I am hurt When I see you happy on phone, I am hurt When you are sad and I can’t help, I am hurt When you are happy and don’t share with me, I am hurt When you are sad and because of me, I am hurt When you are happy and because of someone else (you know who), I am hurt When you talk about someone else, I am hurt When you don’t talk about someone else, I am hurt When you say thanks, I am hurt When you say sorry, I am hurt When you say sorry if I hurt you, I am hurt When you hurt me, I am hurt When I hurt you, I am hurt 2. You are a bad friend too I never needed to thin...

How did I start this song any way When my heart was filled with dismay When I could not take this everyday When I just wanted to run away To suppress my feelings I had some Rum My feet got heavy, my eyes got numb I was hurt and I was sad, I felt so dumb Fuck you people, here I come All the Fears and all the tears were gone It felt as if I was a new Spawn Wanted to have fun, wanted to be moron My name is Khan and the game was ON Now I am loving to sing this song Somewhere I really don't belong Meeting new strange faces along This journey is going to be very long